In the past; I was known to be a sympathetic ear. I found many reasons to cry with those that cried. I found a minute to mourn with people going through a level of hell. My day could be darkened with the idea of a stranger’s loss. This was true until I found out some ugly tidbits of truth (and some of it was what I saw in my own life).
I knew of “street” acting morons that “got” a good job and didn’t know how to build a semblance of a life. They continued to act like what they had been in the past instead of what they could become. They used capital to look like yard sale pimps. They should have started to build up defense for down times but they didn’t. It would have been a different story if they had bad times fallen on them but this was learned idiocy. I would have felt bad but people are responsible for their own short fall. It was time to not mourn but to walk on.
I have had people walk up to me and ask for money. The one guy specifically that pissed me off royally was a dude that “operated” near my company’s building. He had a strange gambit which usually included asking for gas money, conveniently not too far from a gas station that I have used before. When he accosted a lady and myself; I asked him where his car was. (Please note: I ran into this guy a few weeks before when I stopped by the corporate office). He looked at me with a puzzled look. I told him I could get him a full tank of gas if he could get his car to the gas station. He had told me that his car was nearby. I blatantly told him that he must really not want a free tank of gas. He side-stepped me and tried to bother the lady who already was walking away. I walked after him and told the lady that he was a lazy POS that was just looking for money. She appropriately declined and looked at us both with a weird look. I also threatened to kick this guys ass. He obviously never used his muscles for anything besides walking around parking lots near his “mom’s house”. He was young enough to have a life but chose to look like a loser.
In our country; we have certain sub-sections that still grovel and complain after their group, which they identify with, had “lost” in history. (Notably confederacy supporters, “Appalachian-American” types, native North Americans, and a few others). We had fought wars against many of them. (No mistaking that a few of the wars should have been avoided and were not just or proper). But the groups hadn’t won. I believe that Senator Marcy had mentioned that “to the victor goes the spoils”. The winners write history and the one’s that lose are absorbed at best. My people chose to align themselves with the winners although they had lost many times. A guerilla war wasn’t advisable and they moved on with their lives. They didn’t want to be sour or live their lives as losers. Many of these losers I had mention failed to build up the proper type of defenses or they failed to fight hard enough.
My lesson today was that through the many examples I gave, one should build defenses when one is winning or enjoying a large harvest. Your greatest enemy (change, downturn, disease, etc) is around the corner.
I stopped feeling sorry. I chose to move on. I often see the people that “lost” and notice that there was something that they failed to do. There was always something that they could have done better or different.
Learn from the winners and losers both. Find out what you could do differently. That and don’t identify with losers!