Every Wednesday: I never fail to be disgusted with advice columns. I am unsure why they still get paid to do what they do. As always, I am in awe when it comes to awful examples like Dear Prudence and Ask Amy. The columnists seem to get rewarded for giving you bad advice. I think that people get terrible advice from them. I don’t blame anyone that calls advice column responses garbage. I use my postings to correct these responses and help society by being an utmost asshole, (as always, a hat tip to Aaron Clarey at Asshole Consulting).
Consider this piece from the Science Advice Goddess column (courtesy of Arcamax.com)from August 10, 2021:
I’m a woman in my early 20s. The guy I’m dating brought me to meet his friends. His male friends were warm and friendly. The women were awful. One deliberately kept saying my name wrong (it’s not exactly exotic), and two others glared at my miniskirt. Another said something about how low-cut my top was. She made it sound like a compliment, but it was a mean dig. How can these women be so nasty when they don’t even know me? How do I diffuse situations like these?
I find it ironic that I often had seen promising signs in a few of my workplaces that female workers were making an incredible amount of headway towards the goals that they had set. The speeches I have heard supporting them were beyond inspirational, driving everyone to believe that they were going to “roar” in the professional sense. I had seen many of those female coworkers hit the huge numbers and earn the respect of their male coworkers. Most of the companies, along with our community college systems, had hugely successful female centric training programs. I believe that they had helped women break through certain barriers.
You may ask me what barriers sat in front of you. At one time, it may have been sexism or sexual harassers. It might have been the greedy. But in our current times, it is often an enemy that you may not think of.
This same enemy or opponent has been known to show its ugly head in our communities, making your life a living hell. It affects your relationships and allows for you to get a proverbial knife in the back. People in our lives often are thrown on to battle lines because of them. You may ask me who this is.
It is the competing woman. She comes in many forms. She competes for resources and influence, even if not immediately tangible. They fight for potential property and lovers. This woman may not know that she does it.
Their warfare spans from passive aggressive methods to actual violence, among attempts to disfigure. Few of them owe allegiance to other women. They often use watered down methods to keep them in line, often using low end methods to make sure that their friends don’t get more successful than them.
It may come to your surprise that strange women will try to “cut” you down. It shouldn’t. They didn’t like the fact that you had enough confidence to wear what you did. You were an outsider that hadn’t “earned” their keep.
I would tell you to be polite but upfront. Feel free to respond: “You must like what you see since I have seen two of you staring at me”. I would also screw up the person’s name who screwed up yours. Feel free to give them a nickname like “sis” or something close to that. I would also offer to let the woman who made the comment about your top borrow said top.
A confident answer will do one or two things for you: (1) Earn their respect. (2) Drive them crazy. It won’t hurt you as long as you take care of what really matters. I wouldn’t sweat the catty women in your life as long as you are aware.
I don’t imagine that I will have a shortage of emails to answer. I would love to start doing this for anyone that sends me an email. If this is you; email us at email@example.com
If you hate advice columns; I don’t blame you. If it isn’t soft people giving advice; it is someone trying to justify acting like an insensitive asshole. Till next week.