The Matters W/ Matt: Emotional Blackmail

As I have done in the past few weeks; I found a reason to find myself disgusted by advice columns. I laugh and cringe when it comes to old standby’s like Ask Amy and the formerly great Dear Abby. Most of these columnists are naturally inclined to give you bad advice. I think that people, especially men, get terrible advice that will steer them wrong. I don’t blame anyone that calls advice column responses tripe. I always wanted to correct their responses and help society by being an utmost asshole, (hat tip to Aaron Clarey @ Asshole Consulting).

Consider this piece from a local newspaper, originally from Dear Prudence’s column (July 2, 2020): (watered down by yours truly)

Dear Prudence,

I’m newly married, about six months now. My wife had difficulties that resulted in her getting kicked out of her master’s program. Until this point she had taken out around $100,000 in loans. I’ve been trying to persuade her to get a job, any job, to help pay down her student debt, but she always says, “I’d rather end it all than work a job I don’t love.” I entered this marriage thinking we’d be equal partners, but I’m finding that’s not the case. I’ve tried talking about it, but she claims it makes her “too stressed” and “too angry to talk about.” How can I approach this? It’s unlikely she’ll be able to work in her original field, and I don’t think I can support us and her student debt alone.

——Ready to Talk

(A) Ready to Talk, Matt wants to help you. I am unlike other people and will give you tough advice. You need to hit the pavement bad. You are the sucker supporting two people. You are and will continue to pay her bills (or mistakes) off. You aren’t equals. You can’t make her happy. She won’t kill herself, she just wants attention. She isn’t healthy and doesn’t want to be a healthy member of your party. You have only been at it for six months. Learn from your mistakes. She doesn’t and won’t care how you feel.  Next time, don’t wife up a collection of red flags.

I don’t imagine that I will have a shortage of emails to answer. I would love to start doing this for anyone that sends me an email. If this is you; email us at freemattpodcast@gmail.com

If you hate advice columns; I don’t blame you. If it isn’t soft people giving advice; it is someone trying to justify acting like an insensitive asshole. Till next week.

Inhumane Resources: Often Asked Questions

You have been in at least one job interview in your life. (I have been in a few myself). The people I have been in touch with for career advice always agreed with the notion that we should do our homework.

You should be prepared for sitting down for a time frame. Bring appropriate documents. Bring samples of your work. I had a few others but the most common suggestion was to “be ready” for questions. I wanted to share a few of these questions with you and my Inhumane answers.

(1) Where do you see yourself in five years???

Although I see myself as a disillusioned nihilist; I see myself five years older. I see myself at this table interrogating some poor inexperienced guy, wondering why our resume’ screening software didn’t stop this guy. I see myself wondering why we couldn’t get three people together to look at resumes ourselves.

(2) Out of all the candidates, why should we hire you?

You should hire me because I’m one of the few people who doesn’t want to b*llshit you. Lying never rewarded me. I can sleep well at night telling you what I had in mind. Your business can get tanked by a sniveling weasel that wouldnt call you with bad news. I will pull you aside and cover you so you can zip your fly. Im not your friend but with enough time I could be a brother to you.

(3) What kind of workplace do you like best?

I like the kind of workplace where my boss isnt a complete sniveling putz or an asskissing micromanager. I like a temperate environment with negative ventilation. I like when I dont have to smell Lean Cuisine and I have at least one saucy coworker that doesnt mind a great joke on occasion. I am fond of a safety department that doesnt try to stick a workplace injury on an injured person, especially the type of place that doesnt care about their wellbeing but would rather spring a drug test on someone instead of showing an humility.

 

See folks; these are the kinds of answers that no one will give you. It would be a lot easier if we could be spared an interview when we know that you already had a candidate in mind. You could tell us to shove off through one of those auto-sent emails that many HR departments are fond of.

I always have answers for you from the Inhumane Resources dept. Till next time.

 

Seeing Another Man’s Regret

I found it necessary to piggyback on an email I received from Zac Small from Leadership and Action.com. Below is a snippet I found important:

 

“Sometimes not taking an action leaves the haunting “What if?” to echo throughout the chambers of your mind for years, leaving you chasing redemption or suffering from the toxic effects of the mental poison called regret.

​

This brings us to today’s topic, a message I get on a relatively frequent basis which is some iteration of, “I wish I’d served in the military.“.

 

I had an answer for those that wished that they had served or weren’t able to get in; there were so many people that I had knew that wished that they hadn’t or wished that they didn’t paint themselves into a proverbial corner that limited their options.

 

There were a few that felt that they lost years of their lives. Years that many of their college bound compatriots might have enjoyed. When the people in the military were deployed and limited in their freedom; many of the people we knew on the outside enjoyed mixers and frat parties. The people that were not college material started working for contractors got to drink beer, shoot guns, and finger f*ck around. We could not keep a personally owned firearm in our unit.

 

Zac was correct to mention that letting regret nag at you was counterproductive. I learned this firsthand. I regretted not taking my time serious. I jacked around and didn’t use my time wisely. I collected my honorable discharge. It didn’t hurt until I met a war vet my age who went to Iraq.

 

I saw this cat when we were walking around a beer tasting event. He was a little younger than me and he had a prosthetic leg. I joked with him that he should start a professional soccer career. He laughed and he ended up telling me that he and the guy with him were in an IED explosion in Iraq. They lost many people. The one guy survived two IED bombings. I told him that I felt like shit because of my lackluster and uneventful time in the military. What he told me made me cry and feel relieved:

 

You did your job. You didn’t kill your own guys and you didn’t get anyone hurt. You don’t have to feel bad. We aren’t mad.

 

I stopped feeling regret too. The next day was another day in the rest of my life.

 

For my guys that went to college or worked the hustle; don’t regret it. Be thankful the sun was in your face in the morning and that God gave you another great day. Many blessings to you.

Feel free to visit Zac’s website at https://leadershipandaction.com/

Also feel free to check out the Fraternity of Excellence, a brotherhood of  great men at https://fraternityofexcellence.com/

What I’m Reading, Listening to, And Concerned About

Reading:

Jerry @ the Men of Grit blog give a hard to describe piece on experiencing God. You will have to read it yourself. It is a deep and worthwhile article.

 

https://menofgrit.blog/experiences-god/

 

Additional Reading:

I enjoyed this article. Its poked holes in ideas that feminist(s) out forward. The one thing that I put forth in addition to what WK presented was the idea that some feminists might be choosing to be unhappy. Please read and process it yourselves.

 

https://winteryknight.com/2020/06/20/are-feminists-right-to-think-that-gender-neutral-marriage-makes-women-happier-2/

 

Listening:

  A collection of men with integrity speak about fatherhood. I can vouch for all of them when I say that this is an eventful discussion. Enjoy and learn.

https://anchor.fm/barbarianrhetoric/episodes/Fathers–Sons-hosted-by-Nathan-eg0h05

 

Additional Listening:

 Charlie Delto gives us the second part to his original White Privilege podcast. Feel free to wake up against the Woke.

https://open.spotify.com/show/1JEjNYFD1EgRwJtuJa9xZN

 

Concerned:

When you fight a war, you have to know when you have won or winning. I learned this myself. I noticed that I was going through motions alone and I had no one shooting back.

 

FreeMatt in Review: 6-27 to 7-3

Remember, hurt comes in many forms. The right way to treat it will come into light soon. In the meantime, please feel free to peruse the FreeMatt in Review.

 

Masturbation Isn’t China’s Biggest Problem

 I jokingly told people that you can be a frequent masturbator and still serve in the military. I list a few of the real issues that face China’s military.

https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/06/29/masturbation-isnt-chinas-biggest-problem/ 

Canadian Football Hypocrites

 A man loses his job and the corporate sellouts give lip service because of it.

https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/06/30/canadian-football-hypocrites/

Broken Record: You Won’t Be Happy

 Choose to be happy. I gave a long-winded rant that puts you in the frame to be happy and go screw.

https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/07/01/broken-record-you-wont-be-happy/

You Are Judged By the Company You Keep

I told a story about how the people you hang out with effect your future. I dodged a bullet, but many men haven’t.

https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/07/03/you-are-judged-by-the-company-you-keep/ 

More Inconvenient Questions

I ask a few questions that I borrow from various people. Think of the answers yourself and think of solutions from your heart.

https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/07/03/more-inconvenient-questions/

 

We missed a few great opportunities. Take a timeout this weekend. Don’t be a victim and have a good week.

More Inconvenient Questions

To make up for not having a posting for yesterday; I decided to put together an extra on top of my other posting for today

(https://freemattpodcast.wordpress.com/2020/07/03/you-are-judged-by-the-company-you-keep/)

I wanted to aggregate a few questions I gleamed from other websites that I want you to ponder:

DOES THE “LEGACY OF SLAVERY” EXPLAIN BLACK WOMEN’S 72% OUT-OF-WEDLOCK BIRTH RATE?

(https://winteryknight.com/2020/07/02/does-the-legacy-of-slavery-explain-black-womens-72-out-of-wedlock-birth-rate-3/)

Taken directly from the title of Wintery Knight’s July 2nd posting. My question to many is just that. Additionally, can we not show “agency” or some form of personal accountability?

But what exactly is Black Lives Matter asking for?

(https://theamericafirststudent.blog/2020/07/02/exposing-black-lives-matter/)

Taken from Bartholomew Murphy’s America First Student Blog. I want people to know what the organization wants (and offers) versus what many angry members of the public want. They aren’t congruent. One wants to watch western civilization burn and the others want for their grievances to be heard.

If my culture is worthy of critique and ridicule; why isn’t yours?

Pride drives us often in our lives. We make a series of decisions (for ill or good) that shape what happens to us. My culture is often highlighted by stupid television programming and often shittier music. It is skewered by pseudo intelligent types, upper crust CONservatives, and Hollyweird types. I dont get butthurt about it. But you often do. Your pride prevents you from taking outside criticism. You often show the appearance of reveling in your own filth. But your representatives fail to take the criticism in stride (or learn from it).

Are all men created equal or are they not?

(https://mcviewpoint.com/2020/07/02/when-in-the-course-of-human-events-lewrockwell/)

Taken from When in the Course of Human Events – LewRockwell, written by Andrew Napolitano. (Posted in the MC Viewpoint by M.C.)

Do you become less equal than others? Do you feel less equal? This tails into a myriad of different questions. I often say that you can choose how you feel and you can choose how “rich” or “poor” you are. It is beyond law and it moves into character.

 

I want for you to light the fire under your own asses and think about things like this. It is your life now. You are free to be as free as you want to be.

You Are Judged By the Company You Keep

I was instructed at a younger age that when the hammer of justice hits, it often comes for folks that had little involvement in the actual crime. You easily can be the asshole sitting in a car when your “friend” robs a corner store. Your other two “friends” could be screwing an underage girl when you are passed out on the couch. I am sure I could dream up so many other circumstances where you could be thrown in the paddy wagon. I wanted to share another of a personal nature.

I had a friend; we will call him “Big Elk”. He was a friend of mine. He was not known for any major criminal enterprise(s). We mostly drank heavily and stumbled around our usual haunts. Not very productive but not uber criminal. Long story short; I left home, and he had a few near hits with success. He became a minor chef and found some success. He had his own place, etc. Hurricane hits and he was sent back to live with his mother. He gets into some low-end work and hangs out with coke heads. He runs around and does everything from kicking a bunch of people’s asses to burglary. Eventually, he and his buddy (someone I knew) ratted on him. Jail!

The moral of the story is that I easily could have been wrapped up in this. I did not. I chose to be without people instead of the wrong people. I worked hellacious hours and paid bills. (Another guy we used to drink with quit hanging out with Big Elk because of the idiots he hung out with. It hurt his sobriety and he was in the 12-step program). The two of us that chose better or no company did better. And you ask why I bring this up?

Ghislaine Maxwell was arrested a few days ago. Yes, Jeff Epstein’s kiddie wrangler and confidant. The same one that has been photographed with numerous famous and influential people. My mother once told me that you are judged by the company that you keep. I say this to my friends and family: “When you hang out with child molesters, don’t be surprised when people say shitty things about you” (or you get dealt with).

My warning to you and the titans of industry: When your friends are shitty, don’t expect for anyone to be sympathetic. You deserve your just desserts. Be mindful of who you surround yourself with.

Broken Record: You Wont Be Happy

It doesn’t matter if you are a member of BLM, Antifa, a few whiny veterans groups, government informant laden alt right groups, or other eternal victims; many of you won’t be happy.

You will find a reason to keep fighting a war that you might have won (or even a war that the other side decided to call off). There is a good chance that the rest of the world will get the memo.

Many other people that decided to work on what they could control (and not what we couldn’t or kept in pockets of delusion in our own heads). Without quoting the Serenity Prayer; I learned to move on from what I couldn’t control. I put my energy into better things and I decided to be healthier.

You, yourself might consider looking deep into yourself and asking yourself if you won already. Have you? The whole world might not have been enraptured by the latest buzzword or SJW lingo based woke concept but you might have helped feed someone down the street from you. You easily were a friendly face.

(I’m not letting my fellow veterans off that easy. I know plenty of you that waste your energy yelling at tv’s drunk instead of doing something constructive, like be the father that many young men don’t have or cleaning up the neighborhoods you hate that much. You could easily trade the war of your choice for a worthy crusade but your intellectual ineptitude is showing. You can afford it retirees. Ive seen your checks. Your welcome).

There will be a point where you are the 55 year old (or older) maniac yelling about bullshit. You may never have a point where realization happens but the people that were around you will thin out. Those that waste their lives will have no one else. Death by your own hand or even your enemy is possible. The smartest will move on and pray that their old memories wither away as they move on towards more fruitful pursuits. Im the asshole that tells you that you could easily be thinking about family and picnics.

It can start now. You easily can hang up the proverbial cleats. We can get our stupid asses out of the streets and do some inconvenient hard work.

Peace and love. Go screw in the clean cut grass. Watch the clouds go by and get off the phone.

 

Canadian Football Hypocrites

The other day I was thumbing through the dregs of the news world. I wasn’t disappointed by the al.com news writers.

I found a few stories that had some slant to them. (It isn’t exactly written for phony Somalian libertarians living outside of the city). A few of the stories take a soft stance at poor behavior and people that accept violent attitudes. But for once; I found a gem in a pile of proverbial industrial slag.

It was reported that the Edmonton Eskimos released a former college football player that was relatively well known in this state. The reason was gold:

He was released because of a supposed homophobic tweet.

His tweet contained his opinion, not exactly homophobic.

“Ima keep it this real … Man ain’t suppose to be with a man. A women is not suppose to be with another women. THAT’S ME THO! Live life with safety.”

I find it atrocious that he isnt entitled to an opinion. I dont know the particulars of his contract but I doubt it had anything to do with not having his own opinion.

The unhumorous part of the whole shebang is that the Canadian Football League released a statement:

“We in the CFL hold high the Diversity Is Strength banner. Our league makes no claim on perfection, but it does strive to be inclusive, to accept and indeed celebrate our differences, and to respect and honour human rights. There is no place in our league for commentary that disparages people on the basis of their religion, race, gender or sexual orientation. As Pride Month continues, we stand with the LGBTQ+ community. We all need to say no to hate and yes to love.”

It was merely woke bs. In Orweillan fashion, they snap back with “hold high the Diversity is Strength banner”. Their league claims to “accept and indeed celebrate our differences”. 

What about Mr. Jones and the people who are diverse enough to not want to celebrate Pride Month? Could you not stop to think that your league can be diverse with thought? It isn’t very diverse to expect everyone to stoop to your feeble attempts at pandering for dollars.

He even mentioned this in tweets after he was inundated with threats and vitriol. Just for voicing his opinion. I do laugh about this. It could be us next.

He is a black man. He likes being straight, thinks that men and women should be with each other only.

The non alphabet, common sense, evolutionary friendly types wish Mr. Jones the best.

Roll Tide and I hope that you land where you are wanted.

 

 

https://www.al.com/sports/2020/06/edmonton-eskimos-release-christion-jones-over-homophobic-tweet.html

Masturbation Isn’t China’s Biggest Problem

Contrary to what the NY Post tells you, excessive masturbation isn’t China’s biggest problem.

Jacking your junk didn’t stop many sailors from serving with dignity in the US Navy. I knew of a few that could go at it like it was our nation’s number one hobby. The vast majority of these one armed bandits could pass the physical readiness test and graduate boot camp with no major issues.

There are real problems that hamper military readiness in China. Issues with nutrition and holes in the food supply are real problems with potential recruits. Playing video games isn’t that big of a problem.

A huge problem for China as a military force, outside of “malnurished junk jacking” idiots, is logistics. For the short sighted, roads, air access, and access to ocean going ports. The military competes with itself for rail space, roads, and what have you. You have to move the tanks that you use to smash people at protests. You have to move poorly trained bullet sponges so they can invade places like Hong Kong. You don’t want them at home, where they can mutilate their genitals.

This was a half-assed attempt at making you laugh. China has plenty of cool weapons and hidden tricks to attempt to smoke our asses with. And remember:

 

 

 

https://nypost.com/2017/08/25/excessive-masturbation-is-hurting-chinas-military/